Family Planning – not what you are probably thinking?

1
00:00:00,460 --> 00:00:02,920
Welcome to Something More with Chris Boyd.

2
00:00:03,320 --> 00:00:06,120
Chris Boyd is a certified financial planner, practitioner,

3
00:00:06,360 --> 00:00:08,880
and senior vice president and financial advisor at

4
00:00:08,880 --> 00:00:11,160
Wealth Enhancement Group, one of the nation's largest

5
00:00:11,160 --> 00:00:12,800
registered investment advisors.

6
00:00:13,340 --> 00:00:15,219
We call it Something More because we'd like

7
00:00:15,219 --> 00:00:17,360
to talk not only about those important dollar

8
00:00:17,360 --> 00:00:19,520
and cents issues, but also the quality of

9
00:00:19,520 --> 00:00:21,980
life issues that make the money matters matter.

10
00:00:22,500 --> 00:00:25,720
Here he is, your fulfillment facilitator, your partner

11
00:00:25,720 --> 00:00:28,880
in prosperity, advising clients on Cape Cod and

12
00:00:28,880 --> 00:00:29,940
across the country.

13
00:00:30,260 --> 00:00:32,740
Here's your host, Jay Christopher Boyd.

14
00:00:33,140 --> 00:00:33,900
Welcome everybody.

15
00:00:34,180 --> 00:00:35,760
This is Something More with Chris Boyd.

16
00:00:35,800 --> 00:00:37,540
I'm Chris Boyd here with Jeff Perry.

17
00:00:37,720 --> 00:00:40,620
We are the AMR team at Wealth Enhancement

18
00:00:40,620 --> 00:00:42,220
Group and glad to have you joining us.

19
00:00:42,860 --> 00:00:44,340
We've got a good topic today.

20
00:00:45,700 --> 00:00:48,220
A little surprising to me, Jeff, that we're

21
00:00:48,220 --> 00:00:49,620
talking about family planning.

22
00:00:49,800 --> 00:00:50,460
I know.

23
00:00:50,560 --> 00:00:52,360
Well, it's important.

24
00:00:52,600 --> 00:00:55,440
It's important to plan for your family.

25
00:00:56,080 --> 00:00:57,360
But I don't think this is what people

26
00:00:57,360 --> 00:00:57,760
are thinking.

27
00:00:58,020 --> 00:01:00,060
When I think of that, I think in

28
00:01:00,060 --> 00:01:02,600
terms of something like birth control or something.

29
00:01:03,040 --> 00:01:04,319
That's not what we're talking about.

30
00:01:04,459 --> 00:01:05,660
Oh, it's been in the news quite a

31
00:01:05,660 --> 00:01:05,840
bit.

32
00:01:06,280 --> 00:01:10,520
The recent campaigns and the social issues that

33
00:01:10,520 --> 00:01:12,680
are out there, people see family planning and

34
00:01:12,680 --> 00:01:14,640
think, what are they going to talk about?

35
00:01:15,700 --> 00:01:16,800
What side are they on?

36
00:01:18,660 --> 00:01:21,580
We're talking about financial planning for your family,

37
00:01:21,720 --> 00:01:23,460
estate planning, all the kind of planning that

38
00:01:23,460 --> 00:01:29,460
goes into thinking about maybe intergenerational wealth and

39
00:01:29,460 --> 00:01:30,800
the related issues.

40
00:01:30,920 --> 00:01:32,640
Is that what I'm talking about?

41
00:01:33,120 --> 00:01:33,400
Okay.

42
00:01:33,400 --> 00:01:34,300
We can talk about that.

43
00:01:34,560 --> 00:01:34,840
That's fine.

44
00:01:35,220 --> 00:01:35,780
All right.

45
00:01:35,860 --> 00:01:39,380
I think we're both probably past that.

46
00:01:39,680 --> 00:01:40,560
We have families.

47
00:01:40,960 --> 00:01:42,000
We love our families.

48
00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:43,220
I'm worried about these issues.

49
00:01:43,980 --> 00:01:45,120
No, not so much.

50
00:01:46,260 --> 00:01:47,200
It's interesting.

51
00:01:47,420 --> 00:01:49,360
This topic's been on our radar for a

52
00:01:49,360 --> 00:01:49,700
while.

53
00:01:52,780 --> 00:01:55,000
Lisa and I, we just did some amendments

54
00:01:55,000 --> 00:01:56,340
to our estate plan.

55
00:01:56,920 --> 00:01:58,420
I thought about this issue.

56
00:01:58,620 --> 00:01:59,560
You're getting older.

57
00:02:00,380 --> 00:02:02,540
You start to think more about your estate

58
00:02:02,540 --> 00:02:04,460
plan, which is part of it, and your

59
00:02:04,460 --> 00:02:07,120
financial plan, which we've always kind of thought

60
00:02:07,120 --> 00:02:07,419
about.

61
00:02:07,860 --> 00:02:10,580
But you think about it as you get

62
00:02:10,580 --> 00:02:17,060
older, like when I pass and my executor

63
00:02:17,060 --> 00:02:21,160
or trustee, how is all this going to

64
00:02:21,160 --> 00:02:21,500
happen?

65
00:02:21,920 --> 00:02:25,000
I guess the general prudent advice out there,

66
00:02:25,080 --> 00:02:27,420
and we can dig into the details, is

67
00:02:27,420 --> 00:02:32,360
you should tell your family about what your

68
00:02:32,360 --> 00:02:35,940
finances are generally and the outline of your

69
00:02:35,940 --> 00:02:36,560
estate plan.

70
00:02:36,780 --> 00:02:38,160
We'll dig into this.

71
00:02:38,640 --> 00:02:39,560
Yeah, let's talk about that.

72
00:02:39,920 --> 00:02:41,380
Do you agree with that generally?

73
00:02:41,900 --> 00:02:44,480
I think generally it is a good practice.

74
00:02:45,120 --> 00:02:48,860
I understand there are instances where families have

75
00:02:48,860 --> 00:02:53,960
different concerns about family members' ability to handle

76
00:02:53,960 --> 00:02:56,040
money and whether they really want them to.

77
00:02:59,420 --> 00:03:01,540
Well, I think sometimes one of the challenges,

78
00:03:01,760 --> 00:03:04,440
Jeff, is if someone, maybe a degree of

79
00:03:04,440 --> 00:03:04,760
wealth.

80
00:03:07,800 --> 00:03:11,280
I've talked with business owners who would be

81
00:03:11,280 --> 00:03:12,860
like, I'm not going to give it all

82
00:03:12,860 --> 00:03:13,460
to the kids.

83
00:03:13,600 --> 00:03:17,940
I don't want them to know they are

84
00:03:17,940 --> 00:03:19,040
getting that much.

85
00:03:19,920 --> 00:03:21,340
Kind of take away their motivation.

86
00:03:21,540 --> 00:03:23,160
I don't want them to, yeah, exactly.

87
00:03:23,320 --> 00:03:24,860
I don't want them to stall out and

88
00:03:24,860 --> 00:03:26,180
think, I don't have to worry about it.

89
00:03:26,600 --> 00:03:28,900
I'll ride the wave until...

90
00:03:28,900 --> 00:03:30,340
That kind of notion, right?

91
00:03:30,840 --> 00:03:34,400
Sometimes I think that's part of why people

92
00:03:34,400 --> 00:03:35,720
are closer to the vest.

93
00:03:36,320 --> 00:03:38,100
Other times it may be that they feel

94
00:03:38,100 --> 00:03:39,320
like, oh, I wish there was more and

95
00:03:39,320 --> 00:03:49,040
I'm a little bit conscious of my wealth

96
00:03:49,040 --> 00:03:50,640
isn't as much as I'd like it to

97
00:03:50,640 --> 00:03:52,240
be, that kind of thing.

98
00:03:52,960 --> 00:03:54,920
They feel like, that was not that much

99
00:03:54,920 --> 00:03:55,940
to talk about anyway.

100
00:03:56,800 --> 00:03:59,060
I think these are sometimes inhibitors, right?

101
00:03:59,760 --> 00:04:03,140
But big picture, I think it is a

102
00:04:03,140 --> 00:04:06,400
good practice to talk about, what are you

103
00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:06,740
planning?

104
00:04:06,900 --> 00:04:09,660
In that case where someone has substantial money,

105
00:04:09,940 --> 00:04:12,280
that business owner, in the case I was

106
00:04:12,820 --> 00:04:16,560
scenario, I was imagining, recalling.

107
00:04:17,300 --> 00:04:19,579
Well, it's still good to be clear what

108
00:04:19,579 --> 00:04:23,020
your expectations are because what if they're thinking

109
00:04:23,020 --> 00:04:25,920
they're coming into big money and they're not?

110
00:04:25,920 --> 00:04:29,860
You know, better for them to know that

111
00:04:29,860 --> 00:04:34,000
you've got your plan, whatever it is.

112
00:04:35,740 --> 00:04:38,240
I think sometimes too, in the case of

113
00:04:38,240 --> 00:04:41,800
like that, where there's philanthropy involved, that's a

114
00:04:41,800 --> 00:04:43,920
value expression as well.

115
00:04:44,080 --> 00:04:47,780
I think that's something you want to engage

116
00:04:47,780 --> 00:04:49,960
your family in and talk about the notion

117
00:04:49,960 --> 00:04:54,800
that as part of our value system, we

118
00:04:54,800 --> 00:04:58,160
believe in helping our community and here's how

119
00:04:58,160 --> 00:04:59,340
we're going to do it or whatever it

120
00:04:59,340 --> 00:05:00,060
might be, right?

121
00:05:01,900 --> 00:05:04,880
To whom much is given, much is expected,

122
00:05:05,320 --> 00:05:06,280
that kind of notion.

123
00:05:07,400 --> 00:05:10,040
But that can be, when we talk about

124
00:05:10,040 --> 00:05:13,440
legacy, Jeff, we often think about it and

125
00:05:13,440 --> 00:05:17,560
talk about it in terms of financial terms,

126
00:05:17,740 --> 00:05:20,440
what we're, how we're leaving wealth to one

127
00:05:20,440 --> 00:05:22,240
or another, you know, individual.

128
00:05:23,280 --> 00:05:26,200
When legacy can be other things too, it's

129
00:05:26,200 --> 00:05:30,580
values, it's stories, it's other things.

130
00:05:30,700 --> 00:05:34,740
So off track a little bit, but I

131
00:05:34,740 --> 00:05:38,460
think talking about these issues is important because

132
00:05:38,460 --> 00:05:41,260
it can help families to have a greater

133
00:05:41,260 --> 00:05:44,200
awareness of what's intended.

134
00:05:45,080 --> 00:05:48,000
And sometimes it can also be part of

135
00:05:48,000 --> 00:05:52,360
that process of clearly delineating value systems and

136
00:05:52,360 --> 00:05:53,060
things like that.

137
00:05:53,400 --> 00:05:56,100
When it comes to talking about what's intended,

138
00:05:57,080 --> 00:05:59,500
I think that's really important to have some

139
00:05:59,500 --> 00:06:04,420
clarity of here's what we have in mind

140
00:06:04,420 --> 00:06:05,200
for our plan.

141
00:06:05,480 --> 00:06:07,700
Like let's talk about the state plan for

142
00:06:07,700 --> 00:06:07,980
a minute.

143
00:06:09,380 --> 00:06:14,420
You know, sometimes families, and I think we've

144
00:06:14,420 --> 00:06:16,300
talked about this on the show before, sometimes

145
00:06:16,300 --> 00:06:17,560
families just pick the oldest.

146
00:06:18,600 --> 00:06:19,980
Oh, they're going to be the one to

147
00:06:19,980 --> 00:06:21,540
settle my affairs.

148
00:06:23,180 --> 00:06:26,260
It's not always the right person, but sometimes

149
00:06:26,260 --> 00:06:28,640
that's, and if that's what you're doing and

150
00:06:28,640 --> 00:06:30,980
why, and there's somebody else who's involved in

151
00:06:30,980 --> 00:06:32,660
your day-to-day and they're living right

152
00:06:32,660 --> 00:06:35,560
nearby, well, I think it's important to talk

153
00:06:35,560 --> 00:06:37,440
to them about it and say, well, Johnny's

154
00:06:37,440 --> 00:06:38,620
the oldest or whatever.

155
00:06:39,260 --> 00:06:43,700
It's almost like a pick that will not

156
00:06:43,700 --> 00:06:46,440
create strife because it's the expected pick, right?

157
00:06:46,720 --> 00:06:47,520
Maybe so.

158
00:06:48,220 --> 00:06:50,700
It may not be the best choice and

159
00:06:50,700 --> 00:06:53,160
it might be worth talking about why that

160
00:06:53,160 --> 00:06:58,600
would or wouldn't be, but I think it

161
00:06:58,600 --> 00:07:05,480
also could help to alleviate tensions if parents

162
00:07:05,480 --> 00:07:08,880
elaborate on what they had in mind and

163
00:07:08,880 --> 00:07:09,100
why.

164
00:07:09,480 --> 00:07:11,660
A lot of times what happens when a

165
00:07:11,660 --> 00:07:16,220
passing of a parent is old tensions bubble

166
00:07:16,220 --> 00:07:17,260
up within the family.

167
00:07:17,480 --> 00:07:18,020
Absolutely.

168
00:07:18,020 --> 00:07:22,780
And mom always did, dad always did, this

169
00:07:22,780 --> 00:07:23,340
kind of thing.

170
00:07:23,620 --> 00:07:26,040
You always were the whatever, right?

171
00:07:26,760 --> 00:07:31,840
And by having some of these conversations with

172
00:07:31,840 --> 00:07:35,580
the family, you can elaborate on your thinking

173
00:07:37,220 --> 00:07:41,460
and have it as an opportunity not to

174
00:07:41,460 --> 00:07:48,580
convey any kind of confusion around, hey, but

175
00:07:48,580 --> 00:07:50,720
I still love each of you, that kind

176
00:07:50,720 --> 00:07:51,120
of thing.

177
00:07:53,140 --> 00:07:56,280
But let's talk about roles and who should

178
00:07:56,280 --> 00:07:58,100
do what kind of consideration.

179
00:07:58,720 --> 00:07:58,860
Yep.

180
00:07:58,980 --> 00:08:00,600
So, this is really individual.

181
00:08:00,920 --> 00:08:03,800
We're talking about families generically.

182
00:08:04,640 --> 00:08:07,280
Sometimes it's one child, sometimes it's 10 children,

183
00:08:08,020 --> 00:08:09,360
sometimes it's businesses involved.

184
00:08:10,080 --> 00:08:12,340
And so, let's just start with the conversation

185
00:08:12,340 --> 00:08:15,700
about a simple plan where it's a married

186
00:08:15,700 --> 00:08:16,100
couple.

187
00:08:16,660 --> 00:08:20,960
They have means, so they have assets and

188
00:08:20,960 --> 00:08:23,280
they own a house and they have investments

189
00:08:23,280 --> 00:08:25,260
and IRAs, but there's nothing odd.

190
00:08:25,480 --> 00:08:26,620
I think we'll get into some of the

191
00:08:26,620 --> 00:08:27,340
oddities in a few minutes.

192
00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:28,160
Yeah, that's a good point.

193
00:08:28,360 --> 00:08:28,480
Yeah.

194
00:08:28,580 --> 00:08:32,440
But there's no unique circumstances.

195
00:08:32,679 --> 00:08:34,039
It's a standard two kids.

196
00:08:34,799 --> 00:08:35,880
Yeah, let's keep it simple.

197
00:08:35,880 --> 00:08:36,159
Yep.

198
00:08:37,520 --> 00:08:39,580
And so, they're creating, they have their financial

199
00:08:39,580 --> 00:08:41,120
plan and they have their estate plan.

200
00:08:41,179 --> 00:08:42,500
We'll start with the estate plan.

201
00:08:43,120 --> 00:08:45,860
And they're picking one to be the executor

202
00:08:45,860 --> 00:08:48,380
of their will or trustee of their successor

203
00:08:48,380 --> 00:08:49,140
trustee.

204
00:08:49,700 --> 00:08:52,060
And they're picking a healthcare proxy and power

205
00:08:52,060 --> 00:08:52,460
of attorney.

206
00:08:52,620 --> 00:08:54,560
So, they have these three kind of decisions

207
00:08:54,560 --> 00:08:55,200
to make.

208
00:08:55,420 --> 00:08:58,160
So, some of those are financial and some

209
00:08:58,160 --> 00:08:58,700
are healthcare.

210
00:08:59,500 --> 00:09:00,140
That's correct.

211
00:09:00,260 --> 00:09:02,020
So, the first one they're picking is the

212
00:09:02,020 --> 00:09:05,100
executor or personal representative or trustee who's going

213
00:09:05,100 --> 00:09:08,280
to handle the distribution of their assets when

214
00:09:08,280 --> 00:09:09,360
they both pass.

215
00:09:10,080 --> 00:09:10,200
Right.

216
00:09:10,640 --> 00:09:15,380
So, that might be thought of like who's

217
00:09:15,380 --> 00:09:18,160
good at accounting, who's good at finances.

218
00:09:19,340 --> 00:09:19,660
Details.

219
00:09:20,340 --> 00:09:23,240
Maybe who's got some experience with handling money.

220
00:09:23,960 --> 00:09:25,860
You might think along those lines.

221
00:09:26,120 --> 00:09:26,900
Do you agree?

222
00:09:27,500 --> 00:09:28,760
I definitely agree.

223
00:09:29,220 --> 00:09:31,420
And sometimes they default to the older.

224
00:09:31,580 --> 00:09:34,620
And sometimes I've seen, including very recently, which

225
00:09:34,620 --> 00:09:37,320
has not turned out very well for this

226
00:09:37,320 --> 00:09:42,560
particular sibling mix, where both were named.

227
00:09:43,300 --> 00:09:44,120
Oh, yeah.

228
00:09:44,180 --> 00:09:44,860
That's tough.

229
00:09:45,060 --> 00:09:45,480
That's right.

230
00:09:46,060 --> 00:09:50,280
So, co-executives or co-trustees.

231
00:09:51,360 --> 00:09:53,140
And depending on the language of, let's call

232
00:09:53,140 --> 00:09:54,900
it a trust or a will, but depending

233
00:09:54,900 --> 00:09:58,620
on the language of the document, it's likely

234
00:09:58,620 --> 00:09:59,820
that they both have to agree.

235
00:10:00,020 --> 00:10:01,960
And so, I think that's the worst idea

236
00:10:01,960 --> 00:10:03,000
of anything we're going to talk about.

237
00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:04,220
I agree with you.

238
00:10:04,460 --> 00:10:08,180
As much as I get to thinking is

239
00:10:08,180 --> 00:10:09,700
that, oh, that'll be more collaborative.

240
00:10:10,100 --> 00:10:13,000
They'll both have the chance to agree on

241
00:10:13,000 --> 00:10:13,480
things.

242
00:10:13,580 --> 00:10:14,400
They can work together.

243
00:10:15,380 --> 00:10:16,820
Behind that kind of mindset.

244
00:10:17,820 --> 00:10:23,480
It's not heavy handed, but it does raise

245
00:10:23,480 --> 00:10:26,040
the potential, a greater potential for a contest

246
00:10:26,040 --> 00:10:27,020
of wills.

247
00:10:27,820 --> 00:10:29,060
No pun intended.

248
00:10:29,320 --> 00:10:32,620
But with the notion that people might butt

249
00:10:32,620 --> 00:10:34,200
heads a little bit of, no, it should

250
00:10:34,200 --> 00:10:35,720
be this and no, it should be that.

251
00:10:37,680 --> 00:10:37,920
Okay.

252
00:10:38,140 --> 00:10:41,840
So, pick one, generally.

253
00:10:42,820 --> 00:10:44,980
Pick one or go outside to a non

254
00:10:44,980 --> 00:10:46,140
-child.

255
00:10:46,140 --> 00:10:47,720
You don't want it to be a family

256
00:10:47,720 --> 00:10:48,480
tension issue.

257
00:10:48,620 --> 00:10:53,520
Maybe a professional lawyer or whoever might be

258
00:10:53,900 --> 00:10:56,960
could be a good choice in this case.

259
00:10:58,800 --> 00:11:02,360
So, you talked about it in terms of

260
00:11:02,360 --> 00:11:05,280
passing one's death, right?

261
00:11:05,860 --> 00:11:09,640
But the trust or the power of attorney

262
00:11:09,640 --> 00:11:13,360
plays that role while you're alive.

263
00:11:13,460 --> 00:11:16,060
If you become incapacitated.

264
00:11:16,560 --> 00:11:18,340
Incapacitated kind of situation.

265
00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:21,580
And that could be relevant as well.

266
00:11:21,720 --> 00:11:23,400
Who's going to pay my bills?

267
00:11:23,520 --> 00:11:28,000
Who's going to be keeping everything, the ship

268
00:11:28,000 --> 00:11:29,160
running, so to speak.

269
00:11:31,320 --> 00:11:34,900
And this brings into the notion of not

270
00:11:34,900 --> 00:11:40,600
only the financial acumen, but also proximity.

271
00:11:41,820 --> 00:11:46,500
Who's going to be tuned in to my

272
00:11:46,500 --> 00:11:48,700
issues locally, maybe.

273
00:11:48,920 --> 00:11:50,160
Could also be relevant.

274
00:11:50,160 --> 00:11:50,800
Yep.

275
00:11:51,840 --> 00:11:52,280
Absolutely.

276
00:11:52,600 --> 00:11:53,380
It is relevant.

277
00:11:54,120 --> 00:11:57,340
And it's usually the same person, I think,

278
00:11:57,440 --> 00:11:59,640
who is the executive person or representative and

279
00:11:59,640 --> 00:12:00,400
power of attorney.

280
00:12:00,440 --> 00:12:02,540
We're not talking about the healthcare proxy.

281
00:12:03,380 --> 00:12:05,800
But I think there's usually, if you have

282
00:12:05,800 --> 00:12:08,180
in our simple scenario, if you have two

283
00:12:08,180 --> 00:12:10,820
siblings, usually one of them is more organized.

284
00:12:11,080 --> 00:12:12,380
One of them is better with money.

285
00:12:12,780 --> 00:12:14,740
One of them is closer.

286
00:12:14,900 --> 00:12:16,420
Hopefully all those things are the same.

287
00:12:16,420 --> 00:12:16,720
Yeah.

288
00:12:16,780 --> 00:12:18,340
They may not all be the same, right?

289
00:12:18,340 --> 00:12:18,820
That's right.

290
00:12:19,660 --> 00:12:21,080
So it's important.

291
00:12:21,580 --> 00:12:23,740
And it's really important to...

292
00:12:23,740 --> 00:12:26,160
This seems obvious, but I'm sure you've come

293
00:12:26,160 --> 00:12:27,280
across it before.

294
00:12:27,400 --> 00:12:30,540
We're talking about communicating with your family is

295
00:12:30,540 --> 00:12:33,820
after you and your spouse decide who these

296
00:12:33,820 --> 00:12:36,620
people should be, is you should talk to

297
00:12:36,620 --> 00:12:37,280
that person.

298
00:12:37,460 --> 00:12:38,900
You should give them a copy of the

299
00:12:38,900 --> 00:12:39,300
documents.

300
00:12:39,480 --> 00:12:40,940
You should explain, you should say...

301
00:12:41,960 --> 00:12:44,160
What's expected of them and are they willing

302
00:12:44,160 --> 00:12:45,060
to do that?

303
00:12:45,060 --> 00:12:45,460
Right.

304
00:12:45,980 --> 00:12:50,680
And so I'll just share something personal, which

305
00:12:50,680 --> 00:12:51,520
is in line with this.

306
00:12:51,740 --> 00:12:53,140
We just amended some documents.

307
00:12:53,580 --> 00:12:57,880
We changed a successor trustee on our trust.

308
00:12:58,640 --> 00:13:03,660
And so giving this new successor trustee copies

309
00:13:03,660 --> 00:13:06,760
of the documents, explaining what our intent is

310
00:13:06,760 --> 00:13:09,540
in certain areas that they're not ambiguous, but

311
00:13:09,540 --> 00:13:13,700
just adding some color, some detail and giving

312
00:13:13,700 --> 00:13:18,240
the successor trustee your name, for example, and

313
00:13:18,240 --> 00:13:21,280
the name of an attorney that they should

314
00:13:21,280 --> 00:13:22,220
go to for guidance.

315
00:13:22,380 --> 00:13:24,180
The name of all the beneficiaries is in

316
00:13:24,180 --> 00:13:26,560
the trust, but how about contact information of

317
00:13:26,560 --> 00:13:27,140
the beneficiaries?

318
00:13:27,340 --> 00:13:30,620
That's not typically in the documents.

319
00:13:31,100 --> 00:13:34,460
It may say Johnny Jones of Boston, Massachusetts,

320
00:13:34,780 --> 00:13:36,820
but do you have a phone number and

321
00:13:36,820 --> 00:13:38,320
an email for him or her?

322
00:13:39,140 --> 00:13:43,860
And so reviewing from 10,000 feet, not

323
00:13:43,860 --> 00:13:46,260
every particular line, but reviewing your wishes and

324
00:13:46,260 --> 00:13:48,520
why you're doing things and what your intent

325
00:13:48,520 --> 00:13:51,620
is with your person that's going to carry

326
00:13:51,620 --> 00:13:54,740
out your wishes, either when you're incapacitated or

327
00:13:54,740 --> 00:13:57,220
you passed, I think is super important.

328
00:13:58,600 --> 00:13:59,840
I think that's a good point.

329
00:14:01,020 --> 00:14:03,880
So you lay it out in front of

330
00:14:03,880 --> 00:14:04,220
them.

331
00:14:06,040 --> 00:14:08,980
Along those lines, do you want to transition

332
00:14:08,980 --> 00:14:10,960
to the healthcare considerations?

333
00:14:11,320 --> 00:14:13,800
I mean, I think that's just as important

334
00:14:13,800 --> 00:14:15,440
for some of that conversation.

335
00:14:16,820 --> 00:14:18,480
We talked a little bit about this not

336
00:14:18,480 --> 00:14:20,700
long ago when talking about a television show

337
00:14:20,700 --> 00:14:21,600
that we were watching.

338
00:14:22,600 --> 00:14:22,820
The Pit.

339
00:14:23,740 --> 00:14:24,180
Yeah.

340
00:14:24,260 --> 00:14:25,580
Did you end up watching any of that?

341
00:14:25,840 --> 00:14:28,520
We are current because the only release on

342
00:14:28,520 --> 00:14:28,820
a week.

343
00:14:28,940 --> 00:14:29,700
It's a good show.

344
00:14:29,940 --> 00:14:32,780
And in episodes two and three, it carried

345
00:14:32,780 --> 00:14:35,700
over maybe even to four, just for the

346
00:14:35,700 --> 00:14:38,560
listeners who weren't tuned into that podcast.

347
00:14:40,240 --> 00:14:46,200
There is a person that has an older

348
00:14:46,200 --> 00:14:49,680
man and I guess he's a parent, right?

349
00:14:50,100 --> 00:14:50,280
Yeah.

350
00:14:50,620 --> 00:14:53,120
And near death.

351
00:14:53,420 --> 00:14:55,840
Two siblings, a male and a female.

352
00:14:56,900 --> 00:14:59,860
The female is more assertive, we'll say.

353
00:15:00,500 --> 00:15:03,860
And they don't agree on the end of

354
00:15:03,860 --> 00:15:05,360
life and how it should happen.

355
00:15:05,600 --> 00:15:08,800
And this whole two persons versus one.

356
00:15:09,020 --> 00:15:09,380
Right.

357
00:15:09,440 --> 00:15:10,540
There's another example of that.

358
00:15:10,820 --> 00:15:14,180
The healthcare proxy, I think it creates the

359
00:15:14,180 --> 00:15:15,560
potential for problems.

360
00:15:16,080 --> 00:15:17,880
We won't go into the particulars of that

361
00:15:17,880 --> 00:15:21,920
show again, but the concept of a healthcare

362
00:15:21,920 --> 00:15:24,280
proxy is who's going to make decisions for

363
00:15:24,280 --> 00:15:26,200
me if I'm not able to.

364
00:15:26,640 --> 00:15:26,740
Right.

365
00:15:27,040 --> 00:15:32,600
And some jurisdictions prefer an agent to the

366
00:15:32,600 --> 00:15:33,360
healthcare proxy.

367
00:15:34,140 --> 00:15:37,300
Other jurisdictions prefer written directives.

368
00:15:37,620 --> 00:15:43,100
But both are that notion of what's intended.

369
00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:46,140
What do I want to see happen?

370
00:15:47,080 --> 00:15:49,900
And different people have different perspectives on this.

371
00:15:50,140 --> 00:15:52,400
Sometimes it's like, pull out all the stops,

372
00:15:52,540 --> 00:15:52,740
man.

373
00:15:53,760 --> 00:15:55,800
As my friend said, when you're dead, you're

374
00:15:55,800 --> 00:15:56,120
dead.

375
00:15:56,720 --> 00:15:58,700
Got to give them a chance, right?

376
00:15:58,920 --> 00:15:59,200
Yeah.

377
00:15:59,500 --> 00:16:00,460
So that's one.

378
00:16:00,640 --> 00:16:02,940
And then the other is, well, if I'm

379
00:16:02,940 --> 00:16:04,880
at a certain age, maybe I think I've

380
00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:05,540
had a good life.

381
00:16:05,620 --> 00:16:07,600
I don't necessarily want to be on machines

382
00:16:07,600 --> 00:16:09,880
and prolonged indefinitely.

383
00:16:10,780 --> 00:16:15,740
And maybe if there's certain cognitive decline, you

384
00:16:15,740 --> 00:16:19,300
might not want to be having life extended

385
00:16:19,300 --> 00:16:24,780
just indefinitely, you know, that kind of thing.

386
00:16:25,180 --> 00:16:28,040
And so there may be some thoughts around

387
00:16:28,040 --> 00:16:32,120
what do I want, that, and will someone

388
00:16:32,120 --> 00:16:33,740
adhere to your wishes?

389
00:16:34,060 --> 00:16:42,100
Will they know what you want and follow

390
00:16:42,100 --> 00:16:44,480
those wishes, which was a part of that

391
00:16:44,480 --> 00:16:44,920
episode.

392
00:16:45,300 --> 00:16:45,580
Right.

393
00:16:45,920 --> 00:16:48,260
And so, you know, just going off the

394
00:16:48,260 --> 00:16:50,780
episode, but this is real life type of

395
00:16:50,780 --> 00:16:51,140
stuff.

396
00:16:51,500 --> 00:16:53,740
If you put in your healthcare proxy, your

397
00:16:53,740 --> 00:16:56,400
wishes, and, you know, say you don't want

398
00:16:56,400 --> 00:16:59,580
extraordinary means used, you know, you don't want

399
00:16:59,580 --> 00:17:01,460
to pull out all the stops, so to

400
00:17:01,460 --> 00:17:04,900
speak, which is one of the choices that

401
00:17:04,900 --> 00:17:06,220
people use commonly.

402
00:17:07,680 --> 00:17:10,859
I think it's a lot more powerful that

403
00:17:10,859 --> 00:17:13,839
if you have that discussion following, you know,

404
00:17:13,859 --> 00:17:17,359
you've made this document, you've gone through that

405
00:17:17,359 --> 00:17:19,660
whole process and you give a copy to

406
00:17:19,660 --> 00:17:22,400
your healthcare proxy, hopefully it's one person and

407
00:17:22,400 --> 00:17:22,859
not two.

408
00:17:23,280 --> 00:17:26,859
An alternate is fine in case person number

409
00:17:26,859 --> 00:17:27,920
one's not available.

410
00:17:28,560 --> 00:17:28,660
Right.

411
00:17:28,920 --> 00:17:31,800
But, and you actually have the conversation with

412
00:17:31,800 --> 00:17:33,900
them that I prepared this document.

413
00:17:34,100 --> 00:17:34,960
This is my wishes.

414
00:17:35,080 --> 00:17:37,680
I think that goes, it just magnifies the

415
00:17:37,680 --> 00:17:40,880
document because without it, you know, in healthcare

416
00:17:40,880 --> 00:17:43,520
proxy has this document and they're reading it,

417
00:17:43,520 --> 00:17:46,500
but in there in this emotional moment and

418
00:17:46,500 --> 00:17:49,380
they're not really fully prepared to just, you

419
00:17:49,380 --> 00:17:52,160
know, be the judge, if you will, and

420
00:17:52,160 --> 00:17:53,700
just go by the letter of the four

421
00:17:53,700 --> 00:17:55,640
corners of the document, they have so many

422
00:17:55,640 --> 00:17:57,880
other emotions and wondering if you really meant

423
00:17:57,880 --> 00:17:59,280
that, did you understand it?

424
00:17:59,500 --> 00:18:01,940
But if you had told this person, this

425
00:18:01,940 --> 00:18:03,820
is my situation, this is my health, this

426
00:18:03,820 --> 00:18:04,640
is my decision.

427
00:18:05,340 --> 00:18:06,560
I want you to honor it.

428
00:18:07,140 --> 00:18:08,720
I think it would just be so much

429
00:18:08,720 --> 00:18:11,280
more powerful to the healthcare proxy and so

430
00:18:11,280 --> 00:18:15,540
much more, I don't know how to say

431
00:18:15,540 --> 00:18:18,100
it, but it's a more of a gift

432
00:18:18,100 --> 00:18:20,440
to the healthcare proxy that you've had that

433
00:18:20,440 --> 00:18:22,840
conversation and you're relieving some of that burden

434
00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:24,380
from having to make that decision.

435
00:18:25,320 --> 00:18:25,500
Yeah.

436
00:18:26,100 --> 00:18:26,460
Yeah.

437
00:18:27,320 --> 00:18:29,320
You can see how this could lead to

438
00:18:29,320 --> 00:18:30,740
family tensions, can't you?

439
00:18:31,520 --> 00:18:36,260
How some of these challenging decisions and, you

440
00:18:36,260 --> 00:18:40,800
know, trying to fulfill someone's wishes could be

441
00:18:40,800 --> 00:18:42,440
challenging, you know?

442
00:18:44,320 --> 00:18:49,720
So this goes back to, you know, what

443
00:18:49,720 --> 00:18:53,340
we started with, the conversations about this, the

444
00:18:53,340 --> 00:18:55,080
planning that goes into this.

445
00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:59,940
And, you know, as you were describing that

446
00:18:59,940 --> 00:19:03,020
and saying, it's important to talk to the

447
00:19:03,020 --> 00:19:05,440
person who's going to take on that role.

448
00:19:06,290 --> 00:19:09,220
But let's say in that imaginary family of

449
00:19:09,220 --> 00:19:17,920
four, mom, dad, son, daughter, it's actually important

450
00:19:17,920 --> 00:19:22,160
for mom and or dad to talk to

451
00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:24,180
not only the person who's going to be

452
00:19:24,180 --> 00:19:27,660
making the decisions, but also the person who's

453
00:19:27,660 --> 00:19:31,260
not so that they also know those intentions

454
00:19:31,260 --> 00:19:35,920
because they might be more inclined to be

455
00:19:35,920 --> 00:19:39,140
accommodating to them if they understand what's desired.

456
00:19:39,420 --> 00:19:41,340
That's a great point.

457
00:19:41,820 --> 00:19:45,960
And, you know, ideally that conversation happens with

458
00:19:45,960 --> 00:19:48,120
all four of those people in the room

459
00:19:48,120 --> 00:19:49,140
at the same time, right?

460
00:19:49,180 --> 00:19:51,840
So there's no like, well, I don't know

461
00:19:51,840 --> 00:19:53,640
what you really said to the other sibling.

462
00:19:53,720 --> 00:19:53,880
Yeah.

463
00:19:53,940 --> 00:19:56,120
You might've pressured, you know, no sense of

464
00:19:56,120 --> 00:19:58,140
like, oh, you were pressuring them or something

465
00:19:58,140 --> 00:19:58,680
like that.

466
00:19:58,860 --> 00:19:58,960
Right.

467
00:20:00,500 --> 00:20:03,180
I'm in favor of all these family communications.

468
00:20:04,240 --> 00:20:05,500
I think they're important.

469
00:20:05,780 --> 00:20:07,920
I think it gets, I think we're talking

470
00:20:07,920 --> 00:20:09,440
about the easy stuff so far.

471
00:20:09,940 --> 00:20:12,280
It's not easy, but the easier stuff.

472
00:20:14,260 --> 00:20:16,220
I guess, how far do you go though?

473
00:20:16,360 --> 00:20:17,880
I mean, that's where we get into the,

474
00:20:18,980 --> 00:20:21,940
you know, and the real special circumstances.

475
00:20:22,320 --> 00:20:24,140
So say you have, just keep with our

476
00:20:24,140 --> 00:20:26,680
example, let's say during the life of this

477
00:20:26,680 --> 00:20:31,700
family, the son in this case had some

478
00:20:31,700 --> 00:20:33,000
struggles along the way.

479
00:20:33,260 --> 00:20:35,240
So mom and dad helped him out.

480
00:20:35,780 --> 00:20:37,360
You know, maybe he was unemployed for a

481
00:20:37,360 --> 00:20:39,080
while, maybe he got a divorce and there

482
00:20:39,080 --> 00:20:42,300
were times when he needed some extra funds

483
00:20:42,300 --> 00:20:44,740
and, you know, whether or not the sister

484
00:20:44,740 --> 00:20:46,520
knows this happened, right?

485
00:20:46,920 --> 00:20:47,240
Right.

486
00:20:47,440 --> 00:20:47,680
Yeah.

487
00:20:47,820 --> 00:20:51,500
How, how do you handle that in a

488
00:20:51,500 --> 00:20:53,480
way that's fair?

489
00:20:55,780 --> 00:20:58,040
Equal is not always fair or fair.

490
00:20:58,100 --> 00:21:00,860
We, we, we often like make reference to

491
00:21:00,860 --> 00:21:01,200
that.

492
00:21:01,920 --> 00:21:06,380
It can be that fair is equal, but

493
00:21:06,380 --> 00:21:08,660
it's not always that fair is equal.

494
00:21:08,920 --> 00:21:14,780
Let's say in our hypothetical, you know, the

495
00:21:14,780 --> 00:21:21,060
daughter is highly successful professional, financially secure.

496
00:21:22,660 --> 00:21:27,320
Um, and well off, whereas, uh, Sonny's been

497
00:21:27,320 --> 00:21:27,860
struggling.

498
00:21:28,120 --> 00:21:29,040
He's been bouncing around.

499
00:21:29,220 --> 00:21:29,320
Yeah.

500
00:21:29,320 --> 00:21:32,180
You know, so what's, what's fair in that

501
00:21:32,180 --> 00:21:32,720
scenario?

502
00:21:33,400 --> 00:21:37,320
Um, equal might be fair, but there might

503
00:21:37,320 --> 00:21:39,900
be a sense of, well, I think, um,

504
00:21:40,420 --> 00:21:42,600
Sonny needs a little bit more help, you

505
00:21:42,600 --> 00:21:44,100
know, that kind of thing, you know, so

506
00:21:44,100 --> 00:21:45,800
that, but maybe we'll keep it in a

507
00:21:45,800 --> 00:21:49,940
trust and not necessarily give that money to

508
00:21:49,940 --> 00:21:53,000
Sonny to, because he's not as good with

509
00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:54,200
money or whatever it might be.

510
00:21:54,960 --> 00:21:55,060
Right.

511
00:21:55,960 --> 00:21:57,780
So there's no right or wrong answer for

512
00:21:57,780 --> 00:21:58,600
mom and dad here.

513
00:21:58,640 --> 00:22:01,400
It's, it's, it's their money, their assets.

514
00:22:01,640 --> 00:22:04,420
They get to decide, but the tough part

515
00:22:04,420 --> 00:22:05,600
is what do you communicate?

516
00:22:05,760 --> 00:22:08,080
Because if you, you gotta make sure you're

517
00:22:08,080 --> 00:22:10,960
saying something to daughter in that scenario that

518
00:22:10,960 --> 00:22:14,300
says, you know, I love you.

519
00:22:14,460 --> 00:22:14,900
Right.

520
00:22:15,260 --> 00:22:17,880
You know, but look, look how well you've

521
00:22:17,880 --> 00:22:18,160
done.

522
00:22:18,720 --> 00:22:20,060
We have total confidence.

523
00:22:20,220 --> 00:22:20,840
You're fine.

524
00:22:21,580 --> 00:22:21,940
You know what I mean?

525
00:22:21,980 --> 00:22:24,500
If they hear that, that's one thing and

526
00:22:24,500 --> 00:22:26,940
they say, okay, therefore I'm doing something different

527
00:22:26,940 --> 00:22:29,980
than what might seem fair, uh, equal.

528
00:22:32,140 --> 00:22:34,980
Um, or if they just find out at

529
00:22:34,980 --> 00:22:36,940
the reading of the will, what the hell,

530
00:22:37,540 --> 00:22:39,380
you know, they might feel like they've been

531
00:22:39,380 --> 00:22:40,300
slighted somehow.

532
00:22:41,480 --> 00:22:44,220
The daughter could very well feel less than,

533
00:22:44,340 --> 00:22:44,580
right?

534
00:22:44,580 --> 00:22:45,080
Yeah.

535
00:22:45,540 --> 00:22:49,220
And more inclined to want to contest things.

536
00:22:49,960 --> 00:22:50,080
Sure.

537
00:22:50,500 --> 00:22:53,320
To, you know, to say, wait a second,

538
00:22:53,420 --> 00:22:54,260
that's not right.

539
00:22:54,480 --> 00:22:55,480
You know, that kind of thing.

540
00:22:55,620 --> 00:22:57,920
But if there's been some discussion and some

541
00:22:58,560 --> 00:23:00,300
disclosure, it may be different.

542
00:23:01,140 --> 00:23:03,500
So some of these conversations are very difficult.

543
00:23:03,500 --> 00:23:07,200
We're, we're encouraging these conversations, but we've also,

544
00:23:07,340 --> 00:23:09,620
we also know that sometimes people are not

545
00:23:09,620 --> 00:23:12,320
going to have these conversations because of, because

546
00:23:12,320 --> 00:23:13,900
they just can't get there.

547
00:23:13,900 --> 00:23:16,560
You know, they just can't emotionally get there

548
00:23:16,560 --> 00:23:17,820
or handle that conversation.

549
00:23:18,720 --> 00:23:20,380
Don't you think in New England, we, we

550
00:23:20,380 --> 00:23:21,660
tend to have a little bit of a

551
00:23:21,660 --> 00:23:25,680
different culture sometimes about money and disconnect and

552
00:23:25,680 --> 00:23:29,340
openness about much private, much more private, conservative.

553
00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:31,640
Yes.

554
00:23:31,640 --> 00:23:34,040
It's none of your business, you know, kind

555
00:23:34,040 --> 00:23:37,900
of a mindset, you know, and, uh, that's,

556
00:23:37,980 --> 00:23:41,980
I think that's a very common, uh, modus

557
00:23:41,980 --> 00:23:43,060
operandi, right.

558
00:23:43,340 --> 00:23:47,040
That, um, you know, it's just, I don't

559
00:23:47,040 --> 00:23:48,560
share that kind of thing with my kids,

560
00:23:48,640 --> 00:23:49,400
none of their business.

561
00:23:49,500 --> 00:23:50,260
I don't want them knowing.

562
00:23:50,640 --> 00:23:52,500
That's another thing to talk about.

563
00:23:52,580 --> 00:23:57,440
Sometimes people get worried that the next generation

564
00:23:57,440 --> 00:23:59,860
is going to try to control things, take

565
00:23:59,860 --> 00:24:06,340
over, or perhaps, uh, you know, put them

566
00:24:06,340 --> 00:24:08,920
away, you know, in a nursing home and

567
00:24:08,920 --> 00:24:10,080
take over their money.

568
00:24:10,080 --> 00:24:12,660
And, you know, some of those fears that

569
00:24:12,660 --> 00:24:14,980
can evolve, right.

570
00:24:15,300 --> 00:24:15,820
Absolutely.

571
00:24:16,340 --> 00:24:17,480
How do you deal with that?

572
00:24:18,300 --> 00:24:20,820
Well, you can deal with it by not

573
00:24:20,820 --> 00:24:25,100
naming your family as your trustee or power

574
00:24:25,100 --> 00:24:25,480
of attorney.

575
00:24:25,840 --> 00:24:28,300
Maybe you have a trusted friend or someone

576
00:24:28,300 --> 00:24:29,460
who's not a beneficiary.

577
00:24:29,700 --> 00:24:31,760
There are, there are, there is merit to

578
00:24:31,760 --> 00:24:35,260
having a non-beneficiary being the executor or

579
00:24:35,260 --> 00:24:36,660
trustee or power of attorney.

580
00:24:37,220 --> 00:24:40,020
They usually do get some compensation for that.

581
00:24:40,400 --> 00:24:40,560
Yep.

582
00:24:40,640 --> 00:24:43,380
Reasonable compensation is usually, you know, in the

583
00:24:43,380 --> 00:24:45,700
documents and you can outline that greater if

584
00:24:45,700 --> 00:24:45,980
you want.

585
00:24:46,200 --> 00:24:49,940
That can solve that anxiety of like, oh,

586
00:24:50,020 --> 00:24:51,600
they're going to just want to grab my

587
00:24:51,600 --> 00:24:52,740
money and put me away.

588
00:24:53,080 --> 00:24:53,680
You know, that kind of thing.

589
00:24:53,740 --> 00:24:55,900
Well, if they're not interested, if they don't

590
00:24:55,900 --> 00:24:57,360
benefit, why would they do that?

591
00:24:57,680 --> 00:24:57,880
Right.

592
00:24:58,060 --> 00:24:59,420
If it's, you know, that kind of thing.

593
00:24:59,660 --> 00:25:02,240
And that non-family member can stand in

594
00:25:02,240 --> 00:25:05,060
if there's disputes and, you know, be firm

595
00:25:05,060 --> 00:25:06,140
and without any emotion.

596
00:25:06,280 --> 00:25:10,040
Making business decisions are easier than making family

597
00:25:10,040 --> 00:25:11,600
decisions sometimes, right?

598
00:25:11,600 --> 00:25:12,320
Yeah.

599
00:25:13,340 --> 00:25:16,340
Let's talk just related to this.

600
00:25:18,940 --> 00:25:21,040
Families that don't have kids.

601
00:25:22,240 --> 00:25:22,500
Yep.

602
00:25:23,140 --> 00:25:27,780
And now one spouse is left alone.

603
00:25:29,640 --> 00:25:32,680
And this has not been uncommon that.

604
00:25:33,320 --> 00:25:33,640
No.

605
00:25:34,360 --> 00:25:37,360
The, you know, the family's gone.

606
00:25:38,020 --> 00:25:41,580
Maybe the siblings are older or have died

607
00:25:41,580 --> 00:25:41,860
off.

608
00:25:42,040 --> 00:25:42,480
Pre-deceased.

609
00:25:42,660 --> 00:25:42,760
Sure.

610
00:25:44,880 --> 00:25:47,080
And then there's like, who am I going

611
00:25:47,080 --> 00:25:47,700
to talk to?

612
00:25:48,380 --> 00:25:50,800
Who's going to be that person that could

613
00:25:50,800 --> 00:25:51,100
step in?

614
00:25:51,120 --> 00:25:52,820
Well, maybe there's nieces and nephews.

615
00:25:53,980 --> 00:25:55,480
But how committed are they?

616
00:25:55,720 --> 00:25:56,020
Yeah.

617
00:25:57,120 --> 00:26:01,420
You know, I think that's a common and

618
00:26:01,420 --> 00:26:02,060
challenging.

619
00:26:02,340 --> 00:26:06,300
It's not an easy, I totally can concede.

620
00:26:06,500 --> 00:26:09,640
It is not an easy option to how

621
00:26:09,640 --> 00:26:10,560
do I handle this?

622
00:26:10,940 --> 00:26:11,920
Who do I turn to?

623
00:26:12,660 --> 00:26:14,740
There are professionals, as you were saying.

624
00:26:14,960 --> 00:26:17,020
But even there, like, are they going to

625
00:26:17,020 --> 00:26:18,840
care about my health care proxy?

626
00:26:19,400 --> 00:26:20,900
Probably not the health care proxy.

627
00:26:21,020 --> 00:26:23,060
They might do a decent job managing your

628
00:26:23,060 --> 00:26:25,040
assets and paying your bills.

629
00:26:25,360 --> 00:26:28,240
And that can be very prudent, especially if

630
00:26:28,240 --> 00:26:29,780
you're getting older and you start, you know,

631
00:26:29,820 --> 00:26:32,540
you find yourself forgetting to pay something or

632
00:26:32,540 --> 00:26:33,080
you're not sure.

633
00:26:33,500 --> 00:26:33,620
Yeah.

634
00:26:33,720 --> 00:26:36,540
Don't you want somebody watching over them, right?

635
00:26:37,160 --> 00:26:38,720
I'd rather have a professional.

636
00:26:38,780 --> 00:26:40,520
It's going to cost money, of course.

637
00:26:40,600 --> 00:26:42,720
But I'd rather have a professional doing that

638
00:26:42,720 --> 00:26:46,100
than asking a neighbor or, you know, just

639
00:26:46,100 --> 00:26:50,120
some random friend or, quite frankly, a niece

640
00:26:50,120 --> 00:26:52,120
or nephew that I've seen three times in

641
00:26:52,120 --> 00:26:52,560
my life.

642
00:26:52,600 --> 00:26:52,800
Right.

643
00:26:53,160 --> 00:26:53,520
Yeah.

644
00:26:53,640 --> 00:26:55,980
I think there's more opportunities for fraud and

645
00:26:55,980 --> 00:26:58,940
mismanagement there than paying a couple percent or

646
00:26:58,940 --> 00:27:01,520
whatever the fee would be to a professional.

647
00:27:01,680 --> 00:27:04,300
But the health care proxy is definitely one

648
00:27:04,300 --> 00:27:07,540
that you don't see professional health care proxies

649
00:27:07,540 --> 00:27:08,140
out there.

650
00:27:08,200 --> 00:27:08,640
No.

651
00:27:08,860 --> 00:27:09,540
For good reason.

652
00:27:09,620 --> 00:27:09,840
Right.

653
00:27:09,900 --> 00:27:11,440
I mean, that shouldn't be a business.

654
00:27:12,120 --> 00:27:13,900
No, I think it's challenging for sure.

655
00:27:14,060 --> 00:27:16,640
So in any case, there's not an easy

656
00:27:16,640 --> 00:27:17,900
answer on that.

657
00:27:18,060 --> 00:27:19,900
Then you're trying to think in terms of

658
00:27:19,900 --> 00:27:24,880
friends, and probably as who could be that.

659
00:27:25,720 --> 00:27:29,380
And the older you get, the more difficult

660
00:27:29,380 --> 00:27:30,860
that becomes, I think.

661
00:27:31,100 --> 00:27:31,520
That's right.

662
00:27:31,700 --> 00:27:34,480
Identify who will serve that function.

663
00:27:35,800 --> 00:27:39,700
Similarly, Jeff, maybe, I don't know if this

664
00:27:39,700 --> 00:27:41,260
is stuff you wanted to talk about, but

665
00:27:41,260 --> 00:27:44,740
maybe, you know, going down a rabbit hole.

666
00:27:44,840 --> 00:27:49,660
But sometimes families have not only the issue

667
00:27:49,660 --> 00:27:52,720
with someone who's either not good with money,

668
00:27:53,380 --> 00:27:57,020
failure to launch, whatever that kind of mindset

669
00:27:57,020 --> 00:28:02,680
is, or addictions or things that could complicate

670
00:28:02,680 --> 00:28:06,520
their, you know, their family's, you know, willingness

671
00:28:06,520 --> 00:28:09,200
or confidence that it makes sense to put

672
00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:11,680
them in charge of these resources that they

673
00:28:11,680 --> 00:28:12,420
might have available.

674
00:28:12,560 --> 00:28:14,480
And a trust is a good solution for

675
00:28:14,480 --> 00:28:15,280
that circumstance.

676
00:28:15,980 --> 00:28:19,140
But there are increasingly other circumstances, what if

677
00:28:19,140 --> 00:28:24,280
my kid has autism or, you know, or

678
00:28:24,280 --> 00:28:27,060
something where they're on stage or special needs,

679
00:28:27,640 --> 00:28:32,600
maybe schizophrenia, and they're, you know, limited in

680
00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:35,100
their ability to hold down a job or

681
00:28:35,960 --> 00:28:37,220
fill in the blank, right?

682
00:28:37,320 --> 00:28:41,220
There's you can picture different ailments or health

683
00:28:41,220 --> 00:28:46,880
considerations that have limitations on one's abilities, whether

684
00:28:46,880 --> 00:28:52,540
they're, you know, medical, or mental health, you

685
00:28:52,540 --> 00:28:54,560
know, kinds of whatever it might be.

686
00:28:57,140 --> 00:28:59,960
There's a variety of circumstances, or, you know,

687
00:29:00,020 --> 00:29:02,760
Down syndrome, as an example, someone can live

688
00:29:02,760 --> 00:29:06,700
a long life, but may have some degree

689
00:29:06,700 --> 00:29:09,760
of autonomy, but, you know, also may be

690
00:29:09,760 --> 00:29:12,220
benefiting from state benefits.

691
00:29:12,560 --> 00:29:16,940
And, you know, what does one do, they

692
00:29:16,940 --> 00:29:21,100
can't certainly necessarily fill the role of healthcare

693
00:29:21,100 --> 00:29:23,540
proxy in some of these instances, right?

694
00:29:23,960 --> 00:29:26,540
They may not be the person to be

695
00:29:26,540 --> 00:29:27,160
a trustee.

696
00:29:27,480 --> 00:29:29,240
In fact, it may be that we need

697
00:29:29,240 --> 00:29:31,360
to make plans for some of these people

698
00:29:31,360 --> 00:29:33,460
that outlives us, right?

699
00:29:33,580 --> 00:29:35,480
As a parent, we think that way, right?

700
00:29:35,920 --> 00:29:37,700
So just, I mean, there's all kinds of

701
00:29:37,700 --> 00:29:38,740
range of circumstances.

702
00:29:38,960 --> 00:29:41,240
I kind of threw into one big jumble

703
00:29:41,240 --> 00:29:44,740
there, but let's talk about that for a

704
00:29:44,740 --> 00:29:46,540
minute or two too, because that is a

705
00:29:46,540 --> 00:29:49,540
whole other area of complexity in this family

706
00:29:49,540 --> 00:29:54,400
planning discussion that we're talking about here.

707
00:29:55,580 --> 00:29:56,880
What do you, what do you, what do

708
00:29:56,880 --> 00:29:58,340
you want to add to that part of

709
00:29:58,340 --> 00:29:58,940
the discussion?

710
00:29:58,940 --> 00:30:02,800
I'll put those scenarios in two different buckets,

711
00:30:03,020 --> 00:30:03,640
just to start.

712
00:30:04,400 --> 00:30:09,160
Bucket one is for individuals who, your beneficiaries,

713
00:30:09,720 --> 00:30:12,560
who should not receive a large summer money

714
00:30:12,560 --> 00:30:13,800
or be managing it, right?

715
00:30:14,060 --> 00:30:16,200
For whatever reason, you know, you mentioned some

716
00:30:16,200 --> 00:30:19,260
good ones, but it's not to their benefit.

717
00:30:19,440 --> 00:30:21,300
It might be to their benefit for one

718
00:30:21,300 --> 00:30:22,160
weekend, right?

719
00:30:23,020 --> 00:30:25,770
They'd have like a weekend, but so...

720
00:30:26,520 --> 00:30:27,040
No, not real.

721
00:30:27,100 --> 00:30:27,980
But even that, right?

722
00:30:28,400 --> 00:30:29,180
Hazardous, right?

723
00:30:29,300 --> 00:30:29,560
Right.

724
00:30:29,680 --> 00:30:31,440
And then the other bucket is for people

725
00:30:31,440 --> 00:30:33,960
who just don't have the ability to manage

726
00:30:33,960 --> 00:30:36,720
their own money or that they might be

727
00:30:36,720 --> 00:30:39,240
subject to losing benefits or be taking advantage

728
00:30:39,240 --> 00:30:42,100
of financial advice, you know, a career or

729
00:30:42,100 --> 00:30:42,440
something.

730
00:30:44,300 --> 00:30:46,920
But without doing a whole episode on it,

731
00:30:47,440 --> 00:30:50,700
this is where a good trust attorney really

732
00:30:50,700 --> 00:30:55,040
comes into play because whatever the example is,

733
00:30:55,140 --> 00:30:56,740
whatever the concern is, whether it's, you want

734
00:30:56,740 --> 00:30:58,560
to support a loved one who has a

735
00:30:58,560 --> 00:31:01,000
cognitive disability over the next 40 or 50

736
00:31:01,000 --> 00:31:04,900
years, or you just don't want your beneficiary

737
00:31:04,900 --> 00:31:06,600
to get a lump sum of money, you

738
00:31:06,600 --> 00:31:08,860
know, even if they're working, it's just not

739
00:31:08,860 --> 00:31:10,040
going to be healthy for them to do

740
00:31:10,040 --> 00:31:10,340
that.

741
00:31:11,020 --> 00:31:14,260
There's different trust provisions for each that can

742
00:31:14,260 --> 00:31:15,800
really accommodate your needs.

743
00:31:16,480 --> 00:31:19,140
And when there are some circumstances like state

744
00:31:19,140 --> 00:31:23,300
benefits involved, there's particular kinds of trusts that

745
00:31:23,300 --> 00:31:28,940
can be utilized to have discretionary resources to

746
00:31:28,940 --> 00:31:34,000
be available without disrupting state benefits that's worth,

747
00:31:34,900 --> 00:31:36,360
you know, again, like you said, good, the

748
00:31:36,360 --> 00:31:37,360
right kind of attorney.

749
00:31:37,980 --> 00:31:39,460
But I think this also brings us back

750
00:31:39,460 --> 00:31:41,960
to the financial planning components of this.

751
00:31:42,580 --> 00:31:45,960
And thinking in terms of, in that case,

752
00:31:46,300 --> 00:31:48,620
we're not just planning for a couple to

753
00:31:48,620 --> 00:31:51,900
not outlive their resources, as an example, or

754
00:31:51,900 --> 00:31:52,420
an individual.

755
00:31:52,840 --> 00:31:57,420
But now we're thinking about maybe multi-generational,

756
00:31:57,700 --> 00:32:01,700
like not running out of resources and doing

757
00:32:01,700 --> 00:32:05,420
some planning that can forecast how does that

758
00:32:05,420 --> 00:32:05,820
work?

759
00:32:06,300 --> 00:32:08,880
How do we make sure that we don't

760
00:32:08,880 --> 00:32:13,420
have an issue over, you know, two generations

761
00:32:13,420 --> 00:32:15,100
of lifetime, if you will.

762
00:32:17,120 --> 00:32:21,760
And sometimes that can involve just planning around

763
00:32:21,760 --> 00:32:23,100
how we manage the wealth.

764
00:32:23,780 --> 00:32:26,020
And other times we can have, you know,

765
00:32:26,020 --> 00:32:29,200
thoughts around insurance planning, making sure we create

766
00:32:29,200 --> 00:32:32,640
more wealth with an insurance policy or something

767
00:32:32,640 --> 00:32:33,620
along those lines.

768
00:32:36,240 --> 00:32:39,780
Anyway, there's the whole financial planning element.

769
00:32:39,880 --> 00:32:41,420
We spent a lot of time talking about

770
00:32:41,420 --> 00:32:46,600
the estate planning considerations of these kinds of

771
00:32:46,600 --> 00:32:48,280
discussions and conversations.

772
00:32:49,320 --> 00:32:51,120
I think we also need to talk a

773
00:32:51,120 --> 00:32:54,180
little about the financial implications.

774
00:32:54,740 --> 00:32:58,000
And, you know, this goes back to that

775
00:32:58,000 --> 00:32:59,560
question of how much do you want to

776
00:32:59,560 --> 00:33:03,080
reveal to your family about what you have,

777
00:33:03,560 --> 00:33:04,820
where you have it?

778
00:33:05,460 --> 00:33:06,680
How's it positioned?

779
00:33:07,320 --> 00:33:10,660
What kind of expenses are you incurring?

780
00:33:12,140 --> 00:33:14,520
Do you have money in a safety deposit

781
00:33:14,520 --> 00:33:17,120
box or, you know, valuables in a safety

782
00:33:17,120 --> 00:33:18,000
deposit box?

783
00:33:18,160 --> 00:33:19,640
Do they have access to that?

784
00:33:20,560 --> 00:33:24,020
Do you have, you know, the little packet

785
00:33:24,020 --> 00:33:26,520
in the upper left-hand drawer where, you

786
00:33:26,520 --> 00:33:28,800
know, it's like when I die folder or

787
00:33:28,800 --> 00:33:29,160
whatever.

788
00:33:30,180 --> 00:33:30,640
Yeah.

789
00:33:30,940 --> 00:33:33,440
You know, do they know where to find

790
00:33:33,440 --> 00:33:33,780
that?

791
00:33:35,940 --> 00:33:38,180
I had a conversation with my mom just

792
00:33:38,180 --> 00:33:39,580
the other day where she was like, hey,

793
00:33:39,620 --> 00:33:42,040
when I die, here's what I want my

794
00:33:42,040 --> 00:33:43,180
mask to be.

795
00:33:43,240 --> 00:33:45,380
You know, it's got a game plan.

796
00:33:45,680 --> 00:33:46,780
Very common.

797
00:33:46,980 --> 00:33:48,900
I've got some music I'd like.

798
00:33:49,720 --> 00:33:51,000
My mother did the same thing.

799
00:33:51,100 --> 00:33:52,240
She picked up songs.

800
00:33:53,120 --> 00:33:53,220
Absolutely.

801
00:33:56,100 --> 00:33:58,400
So, you know, that can range just like

802
00:33:58,400 --> 00:33:59,240
the state plan.

803
00:33:59,400 --> 00:34:01,680
That could range from, you know, there's an

804
00:34:01,680 --> 00:34:04,640
envelope here to, you know, I'd also like

805
00:34:04,640 --> 00:34:07,060
to see people say, here's my attorney.

806
00:34:07,800 --> 00:34:09,400
Here's my financial advisor.

807
00:34:09,980 --> 00:34:10,380
You know what?

808
00:34:10,460 --> 00:34:11,440
It's unique to everyone.

809
00:34:11,520 --> 00:34:13,360
But here are the people to contact to

810
00:34:13,360 --> 00:34:13,820
help you.

811
00:34:14,199 --> 00:34:14,380
Right.

812
00:34:14,480 --> 00:34:14,800
Yeah.

813
00:34:14,980 --> 00:34:16,139
I want them to help you.

814
00:34:16,179 --> 00:34:17,460
And if you have a question, I want

815
00:34:17,460 --> 00:34:19,520
you to ask this person.

816
00:34:19,620 --> 00:34:20,780
This is my accountant.

817
00:34:20,920 --> 00:34:22,300
This is going to need to do my

818
00:34:22,300 --> 00:34:22,699
taxes.

819
00:34:22,699 --> 00:34:24,980
All the things that you are worried about.

820
00:34:25,260 --> 00:34:25,440
Right.

821
00:34:25,580 --> 00:34:25,840
Yeah.

822
00:34:25,860 --> 00:34:26,820
Worry about this.

823
00:34:27,120 --> 00:34:30,940
Let them know, let your trustee, your executor

824
00:34:30,940 --> 00:34:33,260
or whatever term we're using here, know these

825
00:34:33,260 --> 00:34:33,620
things.

826
00:34:33,860 --> 00:34:35,880
So and tell them as much as you're

827
00:34:35,880 --> 00:34:36,940
comfortable with.

828
00:34:37,320 --> 00:34:39,980
I, you know, this line, this line is

829
00:34:39,980 --> 00:34:43,239
movable for people, but you can at least

830
00:34:43,239 --> 00:34:45,139
tell them who your financial advisor is, your

831
00:34:45,139 --> 00:34:48,120
attorney and your accountant, and perhaps have a

832
00:34:48,120 --> 00:34:48,480
meeting.

833
00:34:49,380 --> 00:34:52,500
In our example with your financial advisor and

834
00:34:52,500 --> 00:34:55,100
go over some of your maybe it's a

835
00:34:55,100 --> 00:34:56,660
setting that you can share some things that

836
00:34:56,660 --> 00:34:59,200
you haven't shared and some thoughts and desires

837
00:34:59,200 --> 00:35:01,520
that you haven't been able to share around

838
00:35:01,520 --> 00:35:02,220
the kitchen table.

839
00:35:02,340 --> 00:35:03,720
Maybe you can do it in the structure

840
00:35:03,720 --> 00:35:06,560
of a meeting with your financial advisor or

841
00:35:06,560 --> 00:35:06,940
attorney.

842
00:35:08,080 --> 00:35:09,120
Yeah, that's good.

843
00:35:09,340 --> 00:35:10,240
Good planning.

844
00:35:12,700 --> 00:35:16,240
I, I have a client who has a

845
00:35:16,240 --> 00:35:18,700
long letter that he updates periodically.

846
00:35:19,540 --> 00:35:19,640
Right.

847
00:35:19,700 --> 00:35:21,780
And from time to time, he'll share it

848
00:35:21,780 --> 00:35:23,200
with me as to, you know, yours.

849
00:35:23,480 --> 00:35:26,140
And it's all about, you know, like talk

850
00:35:26,140 --> 00:35:26,880
to the attorney.

851
00:35:26,940 --> 00:35:28,340
Here's the name and the phone number.

852
00:35:28,400 --> 00:35:29,160
Talk to us.

853
00:35:29,220 --> 00:35:30,180
There's the phone number.

854
00:35:32,500 --> 00:35:36,020
You know, I often think about other circumstances

855
00:35:36,020 --> 00:35:39,160
where what if something happened to one spouse

856
00:35:39,160 --> 00:35:43,520
and it would be great if they could

857
00:35:43,520 --> 00:35:47,260
share, you know, here's who I talked to

858
00:35:47,260 --> 00:35:48,180
about the taxes.

859
00:35:48,540 --> 00:35:51,700
Here's who I talked to about the mechanic,

860
00:35:51,880 --> 00:35:54,900
you know, for the car, you know, here's

861
00:35:54,900 --> 00:35:56,740
the guy who cleans the gutters, you know,

862
00:35:56,780 --> 00:35:57,120
whatever.

863
00:35:57,360 --> 00:35:57,560
Right.

864
00:35:57,720 --> 00:35:59,600
You know, some of those, some of those

865
00:35:59,600 --> 00:36:02,420
kind of mundane things that, well, if you

866
00:36:02,420 --> 00:36:04,760
need a handyman, here's who I'd call, you

867
00:36:04,760 --> 00:36:07,620
know, because I think a lot of times

868
00:36:09,700 --> 00:36:12,760
survivors take on stuff they're not familiar with

869
00:36:12,760 --> 00:36:15,140
just in the chores and the stuff that

870
00:36:15,140 --> 00:36:17,480
we, we all split as in a household,

871
00:36:17,620 --> 00:36:18,740
you know, you do this and I'll do

872
00:36:18,740 --> 00:36:19,080
that.

873
00:36:21,820 --> 00:36:23,260
But what do I do?

874
00:36:23,440 --> 00:36:24,560
You know, who do I call?

875
00:36:24,940 --> 00:36:26,080
Yeah, that kind of thing.

876
00:36:26,480 --> 00:36:28,000
And it's more complicated today.

877
00:36:29,920 --> 00:36:34,960
Probably like most people, most people are using

878
00:36:34,960 --> 00:36:39,020
online bill paying or you get your bills

879
00:36:39,020 --> 00:36:41,960
actually online, you know, rather the old days

880
00:36:41,960 --> 00:36:42,780
you get everything in the mail.

881
00:36:42,900 --> 00:36:44,100
So you just kind of wait it out.

882
00:36:44,260 --> 00:36:44,420
Right.

883
00:36:44,540 --> 00:36:44,820
Yeah.

884
00:36:44,900 --> 00:36:45,700
They didn't know.

885
00:36:45,960 --> 00:36:46,120
Right.

886
00:36:46,500 --> 00:36:46,740
Yeah.

887
00:36:46,860 --> 00:36:48,660
Cause we'd get some, but if you don't

888
00:36:48,660 --> 00:36:52,140
have access to that email and things are

889
00:36:52,140 --> 00:36:54,780
happening automatically, you might see it on a

890
00:36:54,780 --> 00:36:55,480
bank statement.

891
00:36:55,640 --> 00:36:58,760
Again, if you have a bank statement joint

892
00:36:58,760 --> 00:37:01,120
or in a trust or something, but if

893
00:37:01,120 --> 00:37:05,600
it's individual, you know, what do you do

894
00:37:05,600 --> 00:37:05,940
then?

895
00:37:06,320 --> 00:37:06,420
Right.

896
00:37:06,800 --> 00:37:10,460
Well, I had a neighbor who was married,

897
00:37:10,560 --> 00:37:13,540
her husband died and she didn't have any

898
00:37:13,540 --> 00:37:14,860
children back to that example.

899
00:37:15,140 --> 00:37:16,520
And he handled everything.

900
00:37:17,300 --> 00:37:20,260
So she did not have access to his

901
00:37:20,260 --> 00:37:22,140
email and everything.

902
00:37:22,320 --> 00:37:23,320
He did everything online.

903
00:37:23,540 --> 00:37:25,660
So she would, she didn't even really know

904
00:37:25,660 --> 00:37:26,320
the banks.

905
00:37:26,520 --> 00:37:26,680
Right.

906
00:37:27,080 --> 00:37:27,440
Yeah.

907
00:37:27,920 --> 00:37:30,380
So, you know, it's challenging.

908
00:37:30,520 --> 00:37:31,820
How'd you get, how'd you resolve that?

909
00:37:32,780 --> 00:37:34,440
Fortunately she had tax returns.

910
00:37:34,800 --> 00:37:37,160
Well she also had you helping her out.

911
00:37:37,380 --> 00:37:37,700
Right.

912
00:37:37,800 --> 00:37:41,200
And ultimately we found a nephew that was

913
00:37:41,200 --> 00:37:44,000
available to help and interested, you know, qualified

914
00:37:44,000 --> 00:37:44,560
person.

915
00:37:44,760 --> 00:37:47,040
So, but I'm just using that example.

916
00:37:47,200 --> 00:37:48,980
If you're not engaged, if you have the

917
00:37:48,980 --> 00:37:51,720
spouse that's not engaged and everything's online or

918
00:37:51,720 --> 00:37:55,860
almost everything online, you know, it's more valuable

919
00:37:55,860 --> 00:37:57,620
than a phone number is what's the password,

920
00:37:58,020 --> 00:38:00,260
you know, to, to at least where I

921
00:38:00,260 --> 00:38:00,780
can start.

922
00:38:01,080 --> 00:38:01,200
Right.

923
00:38:01,940 --> 00:38:02,560
Yeah.

924
00:38:03,380 --> 00:38:07,900
So I've told you the, the, the thing

925
00:38:07,900 --> 00:38:11,560
I always worry about with these is, you

926
00:38:11,560 --> 00:38:15,200
know, suddenly there's a things flown thrown across

927
00:38:15,200 --> 00:38:16,740
the room, you know, you mean the family

928
00:38:16,740 --> 00:38:21,380
meeting at the family, the family meeting turns

929
00:38:21,380 --> 00:38:24,900
a hostile or something, you know, no, you

930
00:38:24,900 --> 00:38:27,460
know, just emotions can, can run deep on

931
00:38:27,460 --> 00:38:28,000
these things.

932
00:38:28,000 --> 00:38:30,920
And so that's one of those things that

933
00:38:30,920 --> 00:38:33,480
I think parents have to be prepared to

934
00:38:33,480 --> 00:38:34,880
elaborate one.

935
00:38:35,220 --> 00:38:36,780
This is what I want.

936
00:38:36,900 --> 00:38:37,420
Right.

937
00:38:37,540 --> 00:38:39,880
It's they've made a decision and it's their

938
00:38:39,880 --> 00:38:40,400
intention.

939
00:38:41,220 --> 00:38:43,000
But I think it's also important that they

940
00:38:43,000 --> 00:38:46,280
convey some of the emotion.

941
00:38:48,100 --> 00:38:50,420
I, you know, they have to be in

942
00:38:50,420 --> 00:38:53,240
a position where they're able to convey to

943
00:38:53,240 --> 00:38:59,600
their children, their adult children, their, their, their

944
00:38:59,600 --> 00:39:03,940
pride, their love, their, you know, uh, all

945
00:39:03,940 --> 00:39:05,660
the things that they may need to hear

946
00:39:05,660 --> 00:39:08,960
a little bit to, uh, accept some of

947
00:39:08,960 --> 00:39:11,140
these things that otherwise might cause them to

948
00:39:11,140 --> 00:39:12,700
feel tension and stress.

949
00:39:12,920 --> 00:39:13,220
Yeah.

950
00:39:13,700 --> 00:39:15,980
Um, it's really a gift to have these

951
00:39:15,980 --> 00:39:16,400
meetings.

952
00:39:16,400 --> 00:39:17,900
And if you can't have the meeting to

953
00:39:17,900 --> 00:39:20,460
have that letter that you talked about, you

954
00:39:20,460 --> 00:39:23,880
know, that's really detailed and unique, um, in

955
00:39:23,880 --> 00:39:27,360
some ways, maybe both, but the key is

956
00:39:27,360 --> 00:39:30,060
to have some type of communication and not

957
00:39:30,060 --> 00:39:32,420
just leave everybody guessing what your wishes are,

958
00:39:32,960 --> 00:39:35,440
what your finances are, what your plan was.

959
00:39:36,100 --> 00:39:37,960
I think it's a gift to your family

960
00:39:37,960 --> 00:39:39,480
to do those difficult things.

961
00:39:40,240 --> 00:39:40,340
Right.

962
00:39:40,560 --> 00:39:42,300
One of the best things you might do

963
00:39:42,300 --> 00:39:45,280
in this process is not only engage your

964
00:39:45,280 --> 00:39:49,040
family in the process, but engage your financial

965
00:39:49,040 --> 00:39:53,580
and, uh, attorney and accountant kind of professionals

966
00:39:53,580 --> 00:39:59,840
in the process so that, um, introductions, you

967
00:39:59,840 --> 00:40:03,280
know, let your family know who you deal

968
00:40:03,280 --> 00:40:05,920
with and they know who they can talk

969
00:40:05,920 --> 00:40:08,500
to, you know, that everyone is introduced and

970
00:40:08,500 --> 00:40:09,440
has familiarity.

971
00:40:10,520 --> 00:40:13,980
Maybe there's also elements of, uh, helping in

972
00:40:13,980 --> 00:40:16,780
that process of walking through some of these

973
00:40:16,780 --> 00:40:17,180
things.

974
00:40:17,180 --> 00:40:20,000
And maybe that works out to, uh, uh,

975
00:40:20,000 --> 00:40:22,340
like, you know, maybe you explain to your

976
00:40:22,340 --> 00:40:24,540
financial advisor, I'd like you to walk them

977
00:40:24,540 --> 00:40:26,180
through a little bit about our plan.

978
00:40:26,820 --> 00:40:28,600
Uh, so they know, you know, that kind

979
00:40:28,600 --> 00:40:30,140
of thing, you may want that done.

980
00:40:30,700 --> 00:40:34,560
And I think in that context, uh, maybe

981
00:40:34,560 --> 00:40:38,000
some clarity around what kind of circumstance do

982
00:40:38,000 --> 00:40:38,960
we want to discuss?

983
00:40:39,620 --> 00:40:42,780
Um, not only just the current, Hey, this

984
00:40:42,780 --> 00:40:46,060
is where we're at, but the eventualities of

985
00:40:46,060 --> 00:40:48,320
the what-ifs if I die first, if

986
00:40:48,320 --> 00:40:50,680
they die first, what do we expect to

987
00:40:50,680 --> 00:40:50,980
happen?

988
00:40:51,160 --> 00:40:52,520
What's going to be the process?

989
00:40:52,960 --> 00:40:55,240
If something happens that there's a prolonged illness,

990
00:40:55,800 --> 00:40:58,460
how do we envision that being played out

991
00:40:58,460 --> 00:40:59,840
and so forth?

992
00:40:59,980 --> 00:41:02,500
You know, a little bit of the, the

993
00:41:02,500 --> 00:41:04,400
game plan of what we want to cover,

994
00:41:05,080 --> 00:41:07,380
but sometimes a little bit of help in

995
00:41:07,380 --> 00:41:10,880
that process can be a buffer and also

996
00:41:10,880 --> 00:41:11,360
help.

997
00:41:11,560 --> 00:41:12,080
Yeah.

998
00:41:12,420 --> 00:41:15,680
The structure of that can be a lot

999
00:41:15,680 --> 00:41:17,940
more effective than trying to get everyone around

1000
00:41:17,940 --> 00:41:20,580
the kitchen table, you know, with the ball

1001
00:41:20,580 --> 00:41:22,940
game on in the back and everybody's emotions

1002
00:41:22,940 --> 00:41:25,240
on their sleeves and the dogs barking at

1003
00:41:25,240 --> 00:41:25,680
the door.

1004
00:41:25,960 --> 00:41:28,160
And, you know, the structure of a meeting

1005
00:41:28,160 --> 00:41:30,660
in a professional setting with a, with a

1006
00:41:30,660 --> 00:41:32,700
plan of what is to be articulated and

1007
00:41:32,700 --> 00:41:33,720
what's not.

1008
00:41:33,800 --> 00:41:34,260
Yeah.

1009
00:41:34,320 --> 00:41:35,740
Somewhat of an agenda maybe.

1010
00:41:37,020 --> 00:41:38,800
And the introductions have value.

1011
00:41:38,900 --> 00:41:41,380
You know, if you're a sibling or a

1012
00:41:41,380 --> 00:41:44,240
child or beneficiary, um, it's going to be

1013
00:41:44,240 --> 00:41:46,220
a lot easier to call you or call

1014
00:41:46,220 --> 00:41:47,960
the attorney if you've met them and you

1015
00:41:47,960 --> 00:41:50,280
have some understanding of what's going on than

1016
00:41:50,280 --> 00:41:53,020
just randomly trying to find out who was

1017
00:41:53,020 --> 00:41:54,160
the financial advisor.

1018
00:41:54,420 --> 00:41:55,360
Where are the assets?

1019
00:41:55,560 --> 00:41:56,380
Who is the attorney?

1020
00:41:57,560 --> 00:41:57,700
Right.

1021
00:41:58,340 --> 00:41:58,760
Right.

1022
00:41:58,980 --> 00:42:02,200
So with that, um, we cover a lot,

1023
00:42:02,420 --> 00:42:04,240
hopefully of some value to you to get

1024
00:42:04,240 --> 00:42:06,700
started with your thinking about these issues.

1025
00:42:07,220 --> 00:42:10,160
Uh, definitely needs some thought before you start

1026
00:42:10,160 --> 00:42:14,440
to execute, uh, but give consideration, speak to

1027
00:42:14,440 --> 00:42:17,480
an attorney about your estate plan, uh, work

1028
00:42:17,480 --> 00:42:18,840
with your financial advisor.

1029
00:42:19,080 --> 00:42:20,720
And if you don't have someone in that

1030
00:42:20,720 --> 00:42:24,300
role, uh, we're happy to speak with you

1031
00:42:24,300 --> 00:42:25,940
to see if we can be a resource

1032
00:42:25,940 --> 00:42:29,140
in thinking about not only these issues, but

1033
00:42:29,140 --> 00:42:32,420
also, uh, the overall planning around your financial

1034
00:42:32,420 --> 00:42:34,800
plan and your portfolio design.

1035
00:42:35,000 --> 00:42:37,280
Thanks everyone for joining us until next time.

1036
00:42:37,680 --> 00:42:39,260
Keep striving for something more.

1037
00:42:40,760 --> 00:42:42,660
Thank you for listening to something more with

1038
00:42:42,660 --> 00:42:43,380
Chris Boyd.

1039
00:42:43,660 --> 00:42:45,820
Call us for help, whether it's for financial

1040
00:42:45,820 --> 00:42:49,760
planning or portfolio management insurance concerns, or those

1041
00:42:49,760 --> 00:42:51,800
quality of life issues that make the money

1042
00:42:51,800 --> 00:42:52,920
matters matter.

1043
00:42:53,240 --> 00:42:55,420
Whatever's on your mind, visit us at something

1044
00:42:55,420 --> 00:42:58,400
more with chrisboyd.com or call us toll

1045
00:42:58,400 --> 00:43:04,280
free at 866-771-8901 or send us

1046
00:43:04,280 --> 00:43:09,220
your questions to amr-info at wealthenhancement.com.

1047
00:43:09,600 --> 00:43:11,340
You're listening to something more with Chris Boyd

1048
00:43:11,340 --> 00:43:13,960
financial talk show wealth enhancement, advisory services, and

1049
00:43:13,960 --> 00:43:16,100
Jay Christopher Boyd provide investment advice on an

1050
00:43:16,100 --> 00:43:17,400
individual basis to clients.

1051
00:43:17,400 --> 00:43:19,540
Only proper advice depends on a complete analysis

1052
00:43:19,540 --> 00:43:21,000
of all facts and circumstances.

1053
00:43:21,000 --> 00:43:23,080
The information given on this program is general

1054
00:43:23,080 --> 00:43:25,100
financial comments and cannot be relied upon as

1055
00:43:25,100 --> 00:43:26,720
pertaining to your specific situation.

1056
00:43:26,900 --> 00:43:28,880
Wealth Enhancement Group cannot guarantee that using the

1057
00:43:28,880 --> 00:43:30,880
information from this show will generate profits or

1058
00:43:30,880 --> 00:43:31,980
ensure freedom from loss.

1059
00:43:32,200 --> 00:43:34,340
Listeners should consult their own financial advisors or

1060
00:43:34,340 --> 00:43:36,460
conduct their own due diligence before making any

1061
00:43:36,460 --> 00:43:37,220
financial decisions.